I resigned myself to the fact that life wasn’t going to be neither easy nor hard. Nature is indifferent to moods and emotions, everything is, as it is. Fill the emptiness with what you choose yourself to be.
With a tone of scorn and eyes conveying pity I’ve been called “sensitive”. I hate the term sensitive, it brings to mind weakness and vulnerability. To write a poem requires guts. To paint a picture requires vision. To play the blues is to open up ones soul and expose a heart callused and gnarled. To put pen to paper and write is fool hearted and as brave as taking off all your clothes and running down main street bare-ass naked. We’re all awkward and sensitive when naked. Most will point and snicker, but few will understand.
I suppose the opposite of sensitive would be insensitive, indifferent and selfish. Imagine being described as a sweet fellow——-but so terribly insensitive, indifferent and selfish. The worlds full of bleached out souls afraid to air their feelings. These are the ones who lean on trite “Hallmark Cards” to express their orphaned emotions.
I ain’t sensitive, I’m the underdog in a prize fight. I’m the guy that’s willing to take a hundred punches so I can get one in of my own. I’m not particularly fast or talented, but I can take a punch. I’ll weave and bob my way into the face of any dumb ass critique. I’ll shove them against the ropes and whisper in their ear “Is that all ya got?”. My eyes might be swollen shut and my nose may be bloodied, but you’ll have to take me out in a stretcher before I’ll give up. I’ve done my work in the gym. I’ve done my early morning roadwork. I’ve pounded that heavy bag until my fists bled. I’ve hit that speed bag until it became a blur. I’ve earned this chance. I’ve been patient. I’ve waited for my opening. I’m one dangerous motherfucker, I’m one of those with nothing left to lose. I’ll hit that son of a bitch right on the jaw with a right hook.I’ll watchhim crumble like a sheet of bad poetry headed for the waste basket.
People don’t drown cause they can’t swim, they drown cause they can’t hold their breath long enough.And brother, I can go forever on one breath.
Art is everywhere, but most only see it when it’s put in a fancy frame, installed in an art show or defined as such by pretentious critics’. I do love art. I love Bukowski and Kerouac….Their pens like divining rods, separating raw sewage from raw beauty. Some people breakdown playing the piano into a math problem, into intervals and the frequency of notes on a page, but that’s missing the point of playing the piano. Why paint by numbers when there’s so much more waiting outside the lines. Doodle, scribble, close your eyes and let the music flow through you, out of you, into you——like a new color that’s yet to be discovered.
When you hand the keys to the kingdom over to a madman, don’t be surprised when the truth becomes a lie and lies becomes the truth. Don’t be surprised when “We the people” becomes “us against them”. Don’t be surprised when civility is considered a weakness and kindness is only for suckers——where loyalty is a one way street.
When a madman is worshiped like a cult leader, don’t be surprised when his followers become infected with his divisiveness and hate filled rhetoric. There are those who knew better but still said nothing, and now they are reaping the results of their lack of courage. Silence is complicity, misguided patriotism does not excuse violence and insurrection.
We are lost when our democratic ideals are no longer our north star.
There should be a little bit of nothingness in all our lives
I’m talking about the nothingness that my lazy ass cat shamelessly flaunts
She could care less about worries, victories or life goals
She’s at her best when doing absolutely nothing
She sleeps when she wants to sleep
She eats when she wants to eat
She yawns, stretches, then takes another nap in a sunbeam
What others may think of her, does not concern her
If you get on her nerves she’ll put her ass up in your face
To remind ya who’s the boss
She squints her eyes like Clint Eastwood, as if to say “kiss my ass”
Woman are like cats, fickle, complacent, impossible to figure out and even harder to please
A pissed off woman is a frightening thing
There’s “mean” and then there’s “woman mean”
They’re more interested in being right, than being happy
You’ll never out-talk or out-argue a woman
They’ll always get the “last word”
They’ll smirk, pout and then vindictively proclaim “I told ya so”
They find contentment in the nothingness that fills their nothing-less day
It’s all too much, causing a man to mutter, stammer and cus under their defeated breath——sheeeet!
But when a man needs a woman, he’ll act a fool
You’ll see him heel at her side like an obedient dog on a short leash
She’ll yank on that choker-chain every now and again to keep him in his place
Men will connive, lie and feign politeness in a futile attempt to get into a woman’s heart—or more importantly, their pants
So, ya buy them jewelry, take them out to dinner, comment on how beautiful their eyes are, how stunning their dress is
All the while, she'll absentmindedly stare into her compact mirror
Women's personalities are hidden, just like their women parts
Men don’t understand how a woman’s body works
Everything about it is a mystery
It looks like a gapping wound that sometimes bleeds
Nipples, breasts, legs
The softness of their ass
Where to start? What to do?
It’s all to much for a simple man to grasp
But grasp, they shall try—-and try, AND TRY!
Women don’t have time for a man’s bullshit
They have more important things to do
They construct purpose out of life’s nothing-less—ness
They fill every moment, of every hour, of each day with endless busyness
They fabricate grand schemes
Things they're determined to make men orchestrate
Life becomes one long laborious “To Do list”
To women, everything means something, especially the insignificant petty shit
Wipe your feet, take out the garbage, feed the cat, cut the lawn, bring me my tea, it’s too hot, it’s to cold—-did you hear me?
They somehow make babies out of their own flesh and blood
Their bellies swell up to accommodate a parasite living deep inside their womb——
Men only know about the fucking part of making babies
Men are happy in their nothingness
Men’s body parts, are like their personalities, right out there for the world to see, compare and giggle at
They grab at it to show dominance
They believe theirs is bigger and mightier than anyone else’s
They expect it to be worshiped and fawned over
In reality, it’s the goofiest looking thing you’ll ever see
And if they can’t find anyone to grab on it, they’ll jerk on it themselves
I guess this is the way god planned it
And what a sick sense of humor he must have
One of life's greatest mistakes
Expecting to be loved
Expect is a word best not attached to love
There’s many versions of love
Few are lasting, and even fewer are memorable
Some covet it as if it were property
Others wear it on their arm like a flashy bauble
Or, proudly tattoo it permanently upon their skin
Oftentimes vanishing before the ink dries
At times it’s confused with sex
You can have sex without love
And you can have love without sex
After all the gyrations and moaning
Even if she lets you put it where you want?
You’ll still need to find things to talk about at the end of a worn-out night
Humor is the best aphrodisiac
Honesty is the slipperiest of lubricants
It's naively offered up with open arms
Like a soon to be broken Vow
Vows are for love-struck suckers
It’s a fabled belief in security and sincerity
Sometimes, it's a broken record that skips and pops
All noise and no melody
Like a sympathy composed for the deaf
Most want love to be soft and tender
Like sappy verses from a smarmy poem
But it's none of those things
It's a prize fight, a spectacle of blood, rage and courage
It can suddenly switch from an endearing hug to an enraged choke hold
It begins with a polite first kiss, ending up in a dark room that reeks of raw savage sex--that is--if you get lucky
Yet, there are those rare flashes of something
Some may call it love, but that's an over-used euphemism
It stirs an ancient ache that resides deep inside us all
Where does it come from? Why does it go?
Who knows? It's a vexing enigma
It comes with no warranties, no guarantees
It’s fragile, so handle it with care
If ya break it, you'll have to pay for it
Once shattered, you’ll never be able to put it back together
No glue or counseling can dull its painful shards
Once the shelf-life has been reached
You’ll need to decide——should it be thrown out?
Or painfully watch it continue to curdle and sour
Salmonella is a bad way to go
The trouble with love—-is
It’s what happens between life’s otherwise mundane moments
It has no soul or conscience
No sense of right or wrong
It makes fools out of it’s gullible victims
One of life's greatest mistakes
Expecting to be loved
Expect is a word best not attached to love
There’s many versions of love
Few are lasting, and even fewer are memorable
Some covet it as if it were property
Others wear it on their arm like a flashy bauble
Or, proudly tattoo it permanently upon their skin
Oftentimes vanishing before the ink dries
At times it’s confused with sex
You can have sex without love
And you can have love without sex
After all the gyrations and moaning
Even if she lets you put it where you want?
You’ll still need to find things to talk about at the end of a worn-out night
Humor is the best aphrodisiac
Honesty is the slipperiest of lubricants
It's naively offered up with open arms
Like a soon to be broken Vow
Vows are for love-struck suckers
It’s a fabled belief in security and sincerity
Sometimes, it's a broken record that skips and pops
All noise and no melody
Like a sympathy composed for the deaf
Most want love to be soft and tender
Like sappy verses from a smarmy poem
But it's none of those things
It's a prize fight, a spectacle of blood, rage and courage
It can suddenly switch from an endearing hug to an enraged choke hold
It begins with a polite first kiss, ending up in a dark room that reeks of raw savage sex--that is--if you get lucky
Yet, there are those rare flashes of something
Some may call it love, but that's an over-used euphemism
It stirs an ancient ache that resides deep inside us all
Where does it come from? Why does it go?
Who knows? It's a vexing enigma
It comes with no warranties, no guarantees
It’s fragile, so handle it with care
If ya break it, you'll have to pay for it
Once shattered, you’ll never be able to put it back together
No glue or counseling can dull its painful shards
Once the shelf-life has been reached
You’ll need to decide——should it be thrown out?
Or painfully watch it continue to curdle and sour
Salmonella is a bad way to go
The trouble with love—-is
It’s what happens between life’s otherwise mundane moments
It has no soul or conscience
No sense of right or wrong
It makes fools out of it’s gullible victims
In spite of our long days and the swiftness of these passing years
We’ve reluctantly grown old
Old as in running out of time
The potholed street of aging leads to a cul de sac of convalescence
Age robs us of youths vanities
It rubs our hair off, dulls our eyesight and deafens our hearing
We slowly cave in on ourselves
We can no longer get by on our sexiness or youthful bravado
We’re left with a fading wit and the shreds of a once charmed personality
This leaves some bitter, while others are liberated
There’s nothing more attractive than someone who no longer gives a shit about what others think of them
Shriveled skin, brittle bones, hemorrhoids and varicose veins ain’t so bad
It’s the fading of memories and the onset of feeble mindedness that leaves us befuddled
There’s that moment of confusion when we enter a room and forget what we needed there, or what we were looking for, or even why we came there in the first place???
But, I’ll fight like hell to forever remember your face
Rants, Raves and Random Thoughts 