I intended on telling you everything
But forgot too
Neglected too
Didn’t think I needed too
Thought there’d always be time for reminiscing
About the Mundane
Sometimes Insane
Flickering memories
Frozen in golden amber
All these things
Seeping from our possessed hearts
I wish I’d told you
How important you were to me
That you were Irreplaceable
But now you’re gone
Except for
Scattered Life scraps
Listen
I’m sending you these
Gossamer
Visions
About the things we once believed in
Like
Fast cars
Hot unapproachable girls
Nihilism and god
The absurdity of it all
Beer runs
Soul searching
Serious confessions
Nervous laughter
Blinding truths
Music and poetry
Secret battles
Lost faith
Dark drives
Riding in your beat up car
On cold December nights
Dim headlights
Leading us nowhere
Peering at life
With all its illusions
Playing our drunk and stoned
Out of tune guitars
Comparing life notes
Life messes
Life lessens
Opportunities missed
Abandoned promises
Posing our questions
Having flashes
Of momentary clarity
Time sneaked up on us
Here then gone
How could have we known
The inevitability of it all
If given a second chance
I’d play it differently
But you’re gone
And it’s too late
And there’s nothing worse than
Being too late
And you, like most of the holly things I value
I didn’t realize how much I’d miss you
But I do
Slice of Life
==============Of Tears—————
I just want it to rain
I want to be left alone
Except for the sound of rain
On blurry rain strewn window panes
I’m sick and tired of the 24/7 news cycles
It’s not new, news
It’s the same fucked up repetitive bullshit
Over and over
People killing people
Children starving
Bombs exploding
Turning buildings and lives into rubble
Where people
Once walked their dogs
Lived
Proudly called such misery
home?
Where the lost innocence of a child
Is excused as collateral damage
What a cruel world
Listen
The billionaires and politicians
They don’t give a shit about you
They’d just as soon
Grind your bones into dust
And blow your remains into the void
I just want it to rain
I want to be left alone
Perfectly
Quiete
But for the sound
The sound of rain
The sound poetry makes
As silent prayers fill puddles
With tears
———————-Deeper——————
I’m holding my breath
Because you gotta dive deep
Real deep
To find the ethereal things
Where the mermaids and Gods sleep
Deep and deeper
Dark and darker
Beyond the light
Only pure blackness
Down there, where there’s only
Muted sounds
Only the sound of your own heart beating
Thundering between your temples
Fear is in the hands of your demons
And guarding angels
Hold my hand
Show me your face
Show me everything
Do you wanna come with me
Swimming beyond the deep
Past, where there’s no going back
Beyond where it’s no longer safe
I swear
I can’t breathe
Open your mouth
Give me your breath
Give me life
Out Of Place
Moments pass, owned by no one. But I watched you through a draining hourglass. Forgive my troubled thoughts, as I attempt to reach you, but words are only shadows with no substance, truth is there hiding in the blinding flash of dissolving passion. Life is a vapor and love is our only wayback home. And she makes everything okay when everything is all wrong——like me, she’s always out of place.
And that December Sierra wind blows hard leaving coarse lines across my beard stubbled face. I’ve met a lot of people in this life, but I’ve found few with the soul, the grace and life energy that’s possessed in her. She gives the room electricity when she enters into it. She looks at life with focus, clarity and has compassion for those in their times of trouble. She’s aways handy with a joke and a listening ear. She’ll be my harlequin and I her Captain.
She cares about the right things, family, friends, laughter, good conversations, music, savory food, moments of shared companionship. I feel like telling her everything, and we’d connect the dots. Everything is so ironic, everything is stupid, except not for you. You know the punch line, you understand how the story ends. You know me, and that’s not an easy assignment.
Before Someone Shot Lennon (You can’t make new old friends)
I Grew up
In a simpler time
In a small town
Back when the world was still kind
Didn’t have much money
Road trips in rusty cars
Played the hell out of 3 chords
On our beat up old guitars
Thought we were cool
We were gonna change the world
We sang “All ya need is love”
Back before someone shot Lennon
Listened to vinyl records
Music set us free
People over thirty
We couldn’t trust or believe
I’m going back
To all those good times
Kodachrome memories
With all my old friends
No matter where we go
No matter where we’ve been
One thing for certain
You can’t make, “New old friends”
Smashed my cell phone
Threw a brick at my Big Screen
Lets sit down in the backyard
Where we once shared all our dreams
Lets look at old photo albums
When our hair was long
And we wore yesterday smiles
Life’s a vapor, and then it’s gone
Campouts and keggers
Cut offs and ball caps
bonfires down at the river
Cold beers and cheap grass
Exaggerated our victories
Minimizing our loses
Where did the time go
Summers use to last forever
I’m going back
So many good times
Kodachrome memories
You’re a lifelong friend of mine
No matter where we go
No matter where we’ve been
One thing for certain
We can’t make, “New old friends”
Before Someone Shot Lennon (You can’t make new old friends)
I Grew up
In simpler times
In a small town
Back when the world was still kind
Didn’t have much money
Road trips in rusty cars
Played the hell out of 3 chords
On our beat up old guitars
Thought we were cool
We were gonna change the world
We sang “All ya need is love”
Back before someone shot Lennon
Listened to vinyl records
Music set us free
People over thirty
We couldn’t trust or believe
I’m going back
To all those good times
Kodachrome memories
With all my old friends
No matter where we go
No matter where we’ve been
One thing for certain
You can’t make, “New old friends”
Smashed my cell phone
Threw a brick at my Big Screen
Lets sit down in the backyard
Where we once shared all our dreams
Lets look at old photo albums
When our hair was long
And we wore yesterday smiles
Life’s a vapor, Here then gone
Campouts and keggers
Cut offs and ball caps
bonfires down at the river
Cold beers and cheap grass
Exaggerated our victories
Minimizing our loses
Where did the time go
Summers once lasted forever
I’m going back
So many good times
Kodachrome memories
You’re a lifelong friend of mine
No matter where we go
No matter where we’ve been
One thing for certain
We can’t make, “New old friends”
Throwing Stones
I never really told ya how I felt
And still I don’t know why
It hurts to know you’re out there sleeping
under these same sad Denver skies
Though it’s only a dream, I held you in
walking in a world ya never knew
And thats why its so cold to wake up alone
within a dream, lost inside of you
Should of done that
Should of said this
keeping the truth a secret
stones I can’t throw, or forget,
and now I know
it only hurts forever
I never gave you my words
or sang you, your song
instead I let them burn
like ash from a fire that’s gone
now its so quite in this room of blue
blinds drawn to the things we lose
that died a long time ago
within a dream, lost inside of you
Should of done that
Should of said this
keeping the truth a secret
stones I can’t throw, or forget
and now I know
it only hurts forever
Love Dump
Soundtrack Coyotes by Jason Muraz
I always wanted to be in love. But maybe I am one of those who can’t be loved. I try to hard to be funny, to be passionate—-to be lovable. But maybe I always choose the wrong person to love or maybe they picked me by mistake. Everyone needs love, to feel special to another in a world that leaves us all too often feeling ordinary and small. I think I’ve spent to much time alone, I scare myself with all these crazy love thoughts. Maybe I’m crazy and that’s why love alludes me—-I scare sane people off?
Maybe I expect too much of love. Maybe all that crap in poems, songs and stories is just fantasy. I need someone to share my fantasies. Maybe love is pretending, as in pretending to be what another wants and desires? I guess that’s fair enough. Okay then–how about a yard love sale. A half off on all the miscellaneous dreams, wishes, promises and prayers that nobody else wants anymore——or even cares to barter for.
Okay then, I’ll share half my fantasies with you if you share half of yours with me. And all the undesirable junk no one wants we can take to the love dump and set it afire watch it burn to ash.
The Last Second Chance
So be brave
So be bold
Everyone is going thru something
No one really cares or understands why
We all have our own living hell
Everyone is barely hanging on
Tired, lonely and the depressed
It’s just the way this life is
That’s just the way it goes
So be strong
Everyone is going thru something
The ragged homeless guy panhandling for pocket change
The trembling drug addict, dope sick
The innocence locked-up inside us all
The suicidal beauty queen
That’s just the way this life is
That’s just the way it goes
So be alive
Everyone is going through something
There’s howling wolves at the door
There’s night terrors in our dreams
There’s horrors in the waking hours
It’s all red lights and sirens
The noose dangles then tightens
It’s just the way this life is
That’s just the way it goes
So be happy
Everyone is going through something
Regardless of it all
Stare the devil down
Throw rocks at the squawking ravens
Toss your shoes over the power-lines
Watch your bridges burn as they light your way
It’s just the way this life is
That’s just the way it goes
Everyone is going through something
Your deliverance is paid for with your intentions
There’s a sacredness discovered in your last second chance
Nobility awaits the headstrong
You either give up, or get up again
There’s everlasting glory for those who refuse to give in
We find out what were made of in the 15th round
It’s just the way this life is
That’s just the way it goes
Rants, Raves and Random Thoughts 